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Time for another edition of Ranty Lab Muffin! Today we’re dealing with Disney’s first animated feature: 1937’s Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. It feels wrong to lay into a senior citizen of a film from contemporary perspectives, so let’s quickly breeze through a few obvious points that I largely covered last week in my grumpy Jasmine rant:
– Hot princess, wild animals love her, etc. Mini-vom. A few points for not going for blonde Aryan princess like originally planned.
– Snow White turns up at a house and immediately starts cleaning, showing how “good” she is, I guess. Maybe that’s why the dwarfs are perfectly ok with finding a hot woman sprawled across their bed – free housekeeper! Personally, if I found a hot stranger asleep on my bed, I’d ring the police and hide outside in my car, even if he’d just vacuumed the whole house. I guess the seven of them could overpower her if necessary.
– “Some Day My Prince Will Come” – it’s a product of its times, yes, when good girls were encouraged to just hang out and wait for someone to magically turn up, but it’s a bit disturbing knowing that young girls still learn this song and message today.
– Naturally the antidote to the poison is “true love’s kiss” – even in earlier versions of the fairytale, it’s the prince accidentally dislodging the poisoned chunk of apple which saves her, which Disney decided made less sense than true love that develops purely from attraction to looks and singing voices, which obviously never fades as you age. Good luck there with your happily ever after! (Unless Disney’s making a super subtle allusion to Snow White becoming the next Evil Queen when she ages and loses the prince’s love? I see what you did there.)
– Also, women are hotter when they’re passive, especially when they’re so passive they’re dead.
What really annoys me is this: if the Queen can turn herself into a ugly hag, why can’t she botox herself up a bit? Or turn Snow White ugly?
I can’t completely hate the film though – the dwarfs are just too adorable! And I possess pretty much all of their traits (sleepy, happy, bashful, grumpy, sneezy, dopey, soon-to-be Doc… and short).
For the nail art portion of this post, I did a design inspired by the bold patterns on Snow White’s dress:
I used ulta3 Pro Sky Blue, Orly Flare, Skinfood Black Pearl and OPI Die Another Day, and used tape for the chevron feature nail.
Come back next week for Mulan-themed whine ‘n’ shine!
1 – Jasmine